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“So, are you going to see In-My-Country Girl again?” asked Stubby as I gave her a lift home tonight.
“I don’t know.” I explained my predicament.
“I think you should see her again. You might, at least, get a shag out of it.”
“Errr”
“That’s not you, is it?”
“No. No, it isn’t.”
I didn’t think that was Stubby’s attitude either. You live and learn.
After Lyle’s post yesterday (at D4D), I wondered “aloud” in his comments box where in Aaalburgh the D4D crew are temporarily domiciled.
It transpires there’s a stream I never knew of … at the end of my road! Lyle is, therefore, the weirdo* in the corner house. 
It’s a small world.
* Only joking, Lyle. Honest.
For some reason I was very down today (it’s a mystery why, isn’t it?) but was heartened by the offers of sympathetic ears (Ferny the Goth and Nice Married Lady).
NML, in fact, was keen for us to go out for a coffee “or something” when she’s next down at my orifice (in the middle of February). That’s something to look forwards to, then.
I hatched a cunning plan. I’d go home, give Darling Stepson a call to say I’d received his message but was just rushing out, so could I get back to him later in the week.
It worked, disarming him rather. Seems he’s viewing a house on Thursday evening, hence the renewed interest in his inheritance (sic). I have 48 hours to plan the next stage then. I wonder how he’ll take the news that I’ve blown his inheritance (sic) on the WTB?
Having calmed down the little shit I decided that I really was rushing out. I grabbed the sports bag and set off for the gym. My word, that was hard work. I did about a quarter of the recommended workout (I’ll build up to it over time) and then hit the pool for a few lengths just to unwind.
Thanks for the comments and advice about MG3. The issue, however, is that I didn’t get any beachboyesque good vibrations from our shopping trip cum first date. She’s a nice enough lady (albeit mad), but there just wasn’t the frisson of whatever. As I see things it’s a matter of balance. I’m balancing the wish not to raise MG3’s hopes unfairly against the possibility that said frisson is merely delayed and may appear on a non-shopping rendezvous.
Is it me or is this getting bloody complicated?
After leaving me in peace for the weekend, my darling stepson is trying to get in touch again.
He may be an evil, money-obsessed and self-centred pile of carp but I’ve got to hand it to him - he’s persistent. I lost count of the number of times he tried tonight.
I’ll let him stew for another 24 hours and will give him a call tomorrow evening when I get home from the gym.
Probably.
In the meantime, MG3’s been in touch, having thoroughly enjoyed her shopping trip and suggesting a movie for a second date. Decisions, decisions.
I have been induction at the riverside gymnasium.
Fifty minutes of being forced onto shown how to use the various torture devices (all except the rowing machine, from which I’m excused on Dr K____i’s strict instruction), partly so that we (there were three inductees at lunchtime today) know how to use the machines alone but also so that Chris The Sadist can draw up individual training plans for us, using appropriate weights to be lifted and speeds to be achieved.
I’ll probably go for my first session after work tomorrow.
Earlier in the day I was cross-examined by Stubby on my weekend,
“How was MG2?”
“Ah, no. I met MG3 this weekend.”
“You tart!”
This, I felt, was a little harsh. We chatted briefly about the shopping trip date and the tales from MG3’s Old Country. This was a mistake on my part - for reasons which will become clear.
“So, will you see her again?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Why not? She sounds nice?”
“Oh, she is. Mad, but nice. The trouble, you see, is that I have an unrealistic yardstick against which I am measuring,”
“Really?” She seemed a little confused, so I explained.
“Yes, I’m measuring them all against you.”
“Oh.” She had the decency to blush.
“The compound row machine is not my friend.“, I IM’d Stubby after returning from the gym
“Eh?”
“I’ve been to the gym for my induction.”
“Oh yes. In my country we do not have such devices.”
“I suppose you think that’s funny?”
“In my country it is considered so, yes.”
“Do you want a visit from Mr Slap?”
“In my country that’s considered abuse.”
I dropped the subject.
Shazza invited me to attend one of the classes at the gym tonight but having swum first thing and worked fairly hard at lunchtime, I’m in the mood to chill this evening.
What her text actually said was:
Dya wana do body pump wiv me at 8.15?
or, for those hard of txting,
Do you want to attend the Body Pump class with me at 8.15?
Now that I look at this again I think this is what she was proposing. If not, I may have missed a rather significant upturn in my fortunes.
Yes, I’m sure I read it correctly. Shazza’s just not that forward for there to be any other interpretation.
Scene: Riverside Swimming Baths, in the unisex Changing Village (sic). At one end of a row is a rotund Welsh-looking chap, dripping and wrapped in a nice, white towel. He’s standing in front of a locker, fiddling with a key. At the other end of the row is Bikini Girl, wrapped in a blue towel, also fresh from her post-swim shower.
As they swimmers fiddle with their keys, then reach into the lockers to retrieve their clothing, one of their towels slips …
Whoops.
To make up for not going swimming yesterday (yes, yes, I know - shocking, isn’t it?), I was a little too enthusiastic with my daily Wii Sports regime.
I think it was during my last tennis match that my right leg went SPOINGK!
Ooh, it smarts.
WII Fitness Age dropped to 38, too. Oh dear. Not good.
On the plus side, one week in I’m 8 pounds lighter and have moved up one notch on my belt.
No, not me.
Congratulations to young Mike of Troubled Diva who’s celebrating his millionth page view.
Just so that I’m ready, I’ve worked out when rARsh will see its millionth page view and, based on current visitor frequency, it’ll be on 19th July.
That’s 19/07/2047, in a mere 14,782 days’ time.
This does assume that I’ll still be (a) here and (b) blogging 41 years from now.
Due to popular demand, the content mix will remain unaltered although I do hope to have completed my Quest for Lurve by then.
BTW If I include past incarnations then the milestone will be reached on 30th June 2041 although page 100,000 will be viewed (probably by a spambot) on 10th April this year.